blessings

I realized today just how blessed I really am.  I was able to just relax today.  I took a bubble bath and was able to soak in hot water.  Sitting there I was realizing how what I get to do today many people pray for.  In actuality, that's really sad.   That hurts to think about that.  Everyone deserves a day to rest and everyone deserves a chance for either a hot bath or shower.  I never really thought of it as a luxury.  But it is.  Then God graciously reminded me that I have friends that He's blessed me with to keep me down here on Earth.  They humble me.  They teach me everyday.  They even pray for me.  Who gets that blessing everyday?  Who is able to say that about their lives?  None of this really has to do with how much money anyone has or what geographical location I'm in, or even what decade I was born into.  It's the simple things in life that get you thinking about how meaningless really everything else is.  I mean seriously.  God has blessed so many lives in ways that we could only dream of.  Now if you think of Him blessing others with success, perfect genes, the ideal family.... then you're not thinking of what God sees as a blessing.  Sure, these "things" can be but what really is there when all of that goes away?  When you no longer have succes?  When your perfect genes are no longer?  When your family falls apart?  What's left?  I like to look at it as "What's everything that I always need?"  What is it that remains when the world crumbles?  GOD! I was humbled today when a friend shared this with me.  Yes, I'm excited about where my life is going and how God continues to amaze me.... but really, it's all Him that is doing everything I've always dreamed.  What He's given me are tools to use.  I can either not use them and live an okay life.  Nothing-to-be-ashamed-of type of life.  Or will I use the tools He's given me to share who He is not just in my life but in those around me?  Now THAT is a life that I want to live!  So, I must praise God for giving me a life that I love and friends and family that I couldn't live without (though when the time comes, I know He'll give me strength), and people in my life that remind me who HE is in me.  I am VERY thankful for that.

give the best to your body

Proverbs 31:14-16 She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
 
Making healthy decisions is not easy.  Preparing healthy food is even harder.  But reading Proverbs today, I totally got it.  The thoughts and knowledge are completely different than the action.  Taking action for a better life and to take care of our bodies since this is the only one we get is one way we can honor God with our lives.  Take care of the one you have because God gave it to you to take care of.  A way to take care of our bodies, we must prepare and work hard to do so.  It's not easy but it's always worth it. 
 
How do you help prepare and work hard to make sure that your body gets the best that it deserves?

Showing God in your 9 to 5

Today was an interesting day.  Listening to things going on around work and life in general can be taxing on the soul.  Well, when  you start focusing on who God is in these areas in your life you have a stronger peace about how to not only handle certain situations but also how to just let them go.   God definitely helps do that and you definitely cannot do it on your own.  You can get caught up in the drama of life or you can let God catch ahold of their lives.  The decision is your ultimately but He still wins either way. :)

What's in my purse?

Been reading a TON lately.  LOVE it!  Learning much about myself and those around me.  Right now the books that are in my purse are "Made to Crave", "PUSH", and "The Slight Edge".  Each of these books plays a different role in my life and let me tell you they are each helping better who I am as a person.  PUSH has been helping me gather my thoughts and goals together.  Chalene has an amazing way of helping you gather your thoughts and goals that align with your priorities.  If  you are having problems figuring out what you should be focusing on or where you would like to be in the next year you should really consider picking up this book and reading it!  Not just read but implement these ideas into your own life! 

On mondays, be looking out for what I'm learning in my life.  I'm reading various books and will be blogging about them here!  If you have any that you think I would enjoy or would like me to read then let me know.. I'd love to add them to my list!

replace cravings

So many of us have excuses that we start using the same one over and over again because that creative excuse gene is now wearing out.  "I decide tomorrow will be a much better day to keep my promises to eat healthier."  OR "I'll start on Monday and enjoy the weekend's "rewards"."  OR "I don't have the time to cook, I'm just going to order out."  Have we all had these excuses?  If you said no, you need to take a step back and really look at what you do with your eating habits. 

We use food as a comfort or a filler (bordem) or even a friend.  How do you use food in your life?  I can tell you it was my friend for years.  Now, I think it's something that I've dealt with for so long it's just a hard habit or addiction to break. I'm learning day by day and it's a minute-to-minute battle.  I'm also discovering that God has GOT to be my replacement craving.  That sounds awful because He shouldn't be a replacement anything.  But let's face it... if I'm not giving God the time and I'm giving food the time and when I decide that He's worth my time, then I go to Him.  Sounds like a mouthful but in that sense, He is a replacement!  I need to change that!  Food should never take the place of where God should hold us.  EVER!

One way that Made to Crave has helped me (especially today.. oh my goodness) is that when my cravings start becoming something i cannot control, I need to go to God with it in that moment.  Ask God to help give me the willpower to overcome this craving.  Okay, here's my example from today.  We took the kids bowling for our field trip.  Well, we had to eat lunch right?  The teachers got together and decided to purchase FOUR LARGE PIZZAS!  YEP!  F-O-U-R! And baskets of fries and each person getting a pop!  Well, luckily I knew that we were going on the field trip and I said NO N-O ABSOLUTELY NOT! I had two turkey wraps (turkey, whole grain tortilla shell and squirts of mustard), yogurt, string cheese and an orange!  I sat there with my awesomeness, ha and watched everyone else eat cheesy deliciousness! But is it delicious really?  Sure it can be in the moment and it serves a purpose of feeding the need to have pizza but what does it really do to us afterwards?  What nutritional value is there in greasy pizza?  Ha, changes when you put grease in replacement of cheese doesn't it? 

So my question for you is how are you replacing your cravings?  Here's a better question.... are you an abstainer or a moderator?  Do you need to completely abstain from food in the fact that you'll eat everything in sight (me)? or can you moderate your food?  Have one taste and you're okay?  Which one are you? 

reasons

What are the reasons that you eat?  What emotions do you have when you do eat?  For me?
- comfort - drama
- reward - i lost that weight so i'll reward my efforts
- joy - i enjoy this at this restaurant
- stress - work, finances
- sadness - i'm not worth it
- happiness - get time to myself and enjoying a movie, book or two

If I would have delved myself into reading or bettering myself or listening and reading about God, all those nights would have been more productive.  I would have not ended up here. 

One of my worst things is snacking.  Healthy snacks is something that I need to invest in.  For real. 
Praying through the cravings and not focusing on them or feeding them then I will be stronger each craving.  What have you tried that has helped you through cravings?  What is your success secret?

The one thing too that I've realized is that I need to not reward myself even with a cheat meal until I'm ready to say no every other time.  Once I eat one thing, I justify it later with something else.  This is a great weakness of mine.  I'm prepared to conquer it with God's help and yours as well if you'll join me! 

What weakness do you need help with?  I'd be glad to make sure we both overcome it!

Made to Crave

In the first chapter of Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst, she talks about the kind of cravings that most people tend to have and why they are addicted to them.  Well, it's no one's guess that one of mine is food.  I have a BIG problem with food.  Always have.  However, this first chapter started explaining how you can start to overcome these cravings that seems to be holding onto all of us. 

Cravings can be so overwhelming that sometimes that's all it seems we think about.  I know I've been there and these last few days have really challenged me.  What is your craving and how is it consuming you?  My craving, for some reason, when there is unhealthy food in the house or wherever, I want to eat it.  Why?  Well, I could say at first I had no idea.  Once I read this chapter and started thinking about what my craving was and where it was coming from.  Well, one of the exercises at the end of the chapter was if your craving was talking to you what would it say?  Well, I just started writing really not thinking about it, but here's what I came up with.  Does this sound like you?

- I have always been here when no one else has been.
- I made you feel good for years so why would that change now?
- You need me to feel better about yourself.

Does this sound like you?  Let me tell you this has been me for years!  However, I can tell you that I've found other things that I crave more than food.  I've been setting goals for myself and one is to lose 100 pounds in the next year.  How can I do this when I crave so many awful things?  The things that I'm learning to crave now are God with everything I have AND building a business that has been there for me since day one.  Building business for me though is helping others.  Yeah, the money is nice and that's what helps grow the business but the people IN the business have gotten me through so much and all I want to do is give back!  Instead of giving into the crap that haunts me everyday, I think of these two things!  I hear that voice in my head 1) that says that is going to taste so good and 2) don't eat that because you won't get to your goal, you will be putting food first instead of God, you will be letting yourself down which will take down the other people around you....

What goal can you set for yourself that will help you overcome your cravings and self-doubt?  Write it down and refer to it ALL THE TIME!

priorities

What are your priorities?  I just read the first chapter in a new book that I'm reading called PUSH by Chalene Johnson.  She started out the chapter by telling us that most people who are unhappy with their lives compared to those who are happy and successful are not setting their priorities correctly.  Either they don't have any or they just don't care enough to have them at the top of their list.  One of my priorities is to let God be the center of my life.  This can be tough when the rest of the world gets in the way or tries to anyway because Satan drags you down each time you do something for God or get closer to Him.  It can be extremely tough.  However, Chalene had also asked a series of questions that helped you think about your top priority and why it's important to you and why it should be your top priority.  She also explained that your top three priorities are the things in your life that if you had them stripped from you would don't know what you would do.  Such as family, faith, career, health.... whatever it may be.  For me, I realized nothing else matters unless God is at the center.  I can want SO badly for my career to change and be successful or my body to change so I can finally be different but without Him being in the middle of it all, none of that matters!  You need to WANT that priority to be the center or at the top at all times.  What good is it when it's not?  What good is God to me when I choose not to put Him at the top?  Or let's rephrase that.... what good am I? 

I am NOTHING without Him so why should I live my life any differently?  After you come up with your top priority, you're supposed to write down a paragraph or statement if you will on how you will do this.  I have not perfected mine yet because I want to choose different words to make it stronger to me but my rough draft is "My number one priority is to put God first in all areas of my life.  I will seek Him first though His word, mediation, being silent and listening intently to what His will is for my life.  To show others what the Truth of God is and allow God to work in others' lives as I am just the messenger.  Be a witness of His love, patience, kindness, faithfulness, and joy because He has given those to me.  In return, God's grace and mercy will be shown to those around me and they will see only Him.  My mind, body, and soul will be rejuvenated and restored thank to God's presence in all aspects of my life."

Now, like I said, it'll change a little bit but overall this is my top priority.  What's yours? 

God is in every aspect of life

Okay, I know the title of this seems silly because it really is true.  But sometimes we need that reminder, don't we?  These last few weeks, I've developed old patterns which are not just hurting me physically but mentally and spiritually!  I have the great fortune of having wonderful friends that I've surrounded myself with because God brought them into my life.  Each of them brings something different into my life that is indescribable.  I know for a FACT that those people were meant to be there because God knew I couldn't do what I do without their help.  Obviously, He is the only source to my healthy well-being, physically, spiritually, and mentally.  He does, however, provide those various opportunities and people in your life to show who you can be through Him!  I LOVE THAT! I've been reading and listening to lots of different books and audio lately and let me tell you... first off, it's all common sense I feel but all of it hit me like a ton of bricks because I was actually listening to them this time!  God shows us who He is EVERYDAY! Not just with those around us but look around you at what He's created for us to enjoy!  Hear what people tell you and sometimes yeah, take it with a grain of salt, but listen with an open heart as well in case you may miss something.  Listen to those words sung or spoken around you.  Through the laughter of a child.  Through the calmness of the breeze.  Through the mundane of everyday life... the fact that we have an everyday life... at least for now.  Through the whispers of quiet.  Through the roar of a storm.  Through the fragrance of flowers or the freshly fallen rain.  Where is God around you?  You may not feel Him there, but He is ALL the time!  Where is He?  Are you seeing, feeling, or touching Him?  Are you allowing Him to touch you?  What's holding you back?  What causes you to hesitate?  Embrace all that is around you and ENJOY what He's created for you.  Find the positive through the storm.  Walk around with your head held high because you have a God that LOVES YOU! Show people who gave you that smile!  Show people who gave the passion and desires of your heart!  Show people who created YOU! Do not be afraid to share that with those around you!  For in the end, He's all we have and most importantly all we'll ever NEED!  :)

discouraged?

I heard my pastor on Sunday talk about discouragement.... okay, honestly?  I don't remember what else he said.  I think this part of the sermon was directed towards me not just because I am speaking on motivation this week in our team call but because I needed that reassurance that what I'm doing is because He is asking me to.  I had been discouraged this past week because of certain circumstances that arose.  Then I heard pastor's sermon on how we may feel discouraged but God knows what's going on.  We also may feel uncertain.  Meaning, we may not see the whole staircase in front of us but we need to take the step of faith that we'll reach the bottom becuase He's there to guide us along the way!  That just resonated with me!  It was very powerful!  I may have my spouts of discouragement or uncertainty but WHY? God has everything in His hands.  I may not like the fact that I cannot see everything laid out in front of me but would I want to know what's coming next?  I'm sure we'd all like to say yes because we think of the good things that will happen in our future but what about the others?  Would we want to see the things we have to go through to get to the happy stuff?  I don't want to endure that.  Part of the reason why God doesn't allow us to see everything in our future now is because He knows that we cannot handle it all!  He takes care of it.  We just need to walk in the path that He's laid out for us and He'll walk us through the good and bad times!  So if you're discouraged right now (as was I), remember that God already knows what's to come and He already knows how we're going to handle it.  But, He's still there regardless of what we do or do not do!  Discouraged?  I choose to be blessed that I have today to live for Him!

positivity

As most people know, I'm a very positive person!  I love to smile, laugh, meet new people... you name it!  Now what happens when are you faced with adversity? Does a positive person always stay positive?  No.  Ha.  Well, I am human.  However, how do you get through the hard times?  I can tell you that your attitude can say a whole lot!  Regardless of what you believe in, who you believe in (I believe in the Lord God, in case you were confused ;)), your attitude portrays the type of person you are.  Have you seen a homeless person that is actually happy?  I have.  Have you seen a rich person happy?  Yes.  Have you seen someone who has had their whole life stripped away from them; belongings, family, job, etc., happy?  Yes.   Why?  What in the WORLD do they have to be happy about?  Well, when you constantly believe that there is something better out there for you and you know that this is not it for you?  Your attitude can change drastically.  Your attitude depends on how far you can go in your life.  If you feel defeated and depressed and unhappy ALL the time, then you're probably not going to go anywhere anytime soon.  THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU CANNOT HAVE THESE TIMES! I have them sometimes.  We are human, for goodness sakes.  But when you DWELL in them is when you are going to start having issues. "It's only over when you quit" is what Dave Ramsey says.  So regardless of what situation you're in, you can be happy and positive AND succeed!  It's amazing when you start looking at the positive side of things, how you're life can start to look different.  My challenge is this week, when something seems to be going wrong and it probably will feel that way or even BE that way, I challenge you to look at what good can come out of it?  What can you find that can make that situation turn out better just because you found the positive side of the situation?  I would LOVE to hear your story!   Please let me know what you discover!

an inspiring story

Lately, I've been listening to A LOT and I mean A LOT of Nick Vujicic.  His story is compelling!  It is inspiring and definitely made me want to push myself in my business but more importantly in my life!  I've never heard anything like it and the best part is he's human.  I know sounds silly.  But, most people wonder why he smiles so much.  Well, first it's not always been like that.  People can see the change in him and they want that as well!  AND he finally embraced his disability because he knows that God made him a certain way in order to bring Glory to His name.  One goal in life?  Meet Nick!  Okay, enough intro.. just watch and seriously be inspired!

peace

These last few months have been a whirlwind to say the least!  I miss writing and I need to put it into my schedule since things have been so crazy.  However, the times when you can settle down and just be able to type (write) everything out can be so peaceful.  Just recently, I had so many spiritual battles going on that I didn't know where to start, what emotion to have, what to think.  It was absolutely insane!  However, I started listening and BELIEVING the "voice" that was telling me that first off, everything is alright and second, that I'm worth everything that God has put into making me!  WHO KNEW?! Ha.  Seriously though.  I've heard that all my life (not be conceited, but I have from family).  I have heard that I am worth everything in the world.  I've been told that I'm beautiful.  I've been told that I am stunning.  I've been told that I have talent.  But you know what?  I HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT!  I've also been told that I'm fat, ugly, useless, worthless, dumb, slow, even things like not a great friend (which is to me far worse than all the others, i need a secret desire for people to like me).  You know, it takes 10 nice things for one bad thing to be erased in our thoughts?!  Seriously, it does.  Now, imagine Satan telling you all of the horrible things about yourself constantly!  And you believing.  Nothing on the Earth can take that pain away.  However, GOD can!  God took that pain away and seriously ever since then, I've been on cloud nine!  My life is soaring with business, my spirit is healthier, i actually get things done because I'm not listening to all that, i'm sorry, bull crap!

I feel completely and irrevocably at peace with where I am supposed to be right now!  God has blessed me in more ways than I can count.  I SO want to give that back to people!  I want them to know that feeling because there's nothing like it!  What are you going through?  Are you going through something that you just cannot tell anyone?  Or you've told someone but they just don't seem to care?  Seriously!  What are you going through?  If you need someone to talk to, just to listen and if you want me to give advice or I can even just reassure you that I'm here to listen.  Then please let me know!  You can email me at lmallen86@yahoo.com or find me on facebook at www.facebook.com/lindsay.allen5.  Please let me pray for you!

God is bigger than doubt

You know, these last few months have been a whirlwind.  Been unemployed, been employed, then let go, and jobless while trying to build a business living out of my parents' house that I've lived in since I was born.  Not really a college graduates dream life, right?  Well, I was very much under today.  Well first it was storming outside and quite honestly all I wanted to do was stay under the covers and just sleep through it.  Why?  Probably because Satan was attacking me and telling me that I am not good enough.  Honestly, you cannot tell me that you've never felt this way.  It just plain old sucks!  I was unmotivated, unhappy, depressed... how in the world can this all happen in one day to the next?  I was just fine yesterday!  However, the moment we let our guard down is the moment that we'll come under fire! 

I haven't been in the word the way that I should be or the way that I was back when I was actually extremely busy with work, school, business, trying to build a relationship, and actually studying God's word while living on my own and paying my own bills.  How was that less stressful than sleeping until I feel like getting up, doing basically what I want when I want with nothing really tying me down............ except.............. the fact that two reasons: one) i don't have a job, therefore no money, therefore I'm practically confined to the house, two) God is not present in my everyday life!  So, we're going to fix that!  I read more of Proverbs today.  I read three chapters on Sunday and then read my goal board (a visible place to put my goals so I cannot shy away from them) and it said to be more in the word everyday.  So, I decided to read 5 more chapters of Proverbs.  I truly believe I wasn't supposed to read the Bible yesterday.  I know weird, because God brought me out of my funk today.  He provided the book of the Bible that I needed to read with the chapters on the exact day that I needed them!  PRETTY GOSH DARN COOL, if you ask me! 

God is bigger than doubt.  Not just today but all the time!  Today I was reminded of that regardless of my situation, God is bigger than my issues and self-pity.  He can pull me out of anything I'm in at all times.  Sometimes He lets us "wallow" in it for a while so we can learn to reach out for Him.  When we do, our morale perks up as well as the fact that all of that doubt just disappears.  Are you doubting God today?  Why?  What is keeping you from having that relationship with Him?  It's a day-by-day basis but everyday it's worth letting go to let GOD! 

I seriously need to get back to doing this blog

Like for real... there were two things that hit me today like a ton of bricks... I wanted to share them with you. All they are are quotes but nothing really needs to be explained other than just reading them.  They made me cry!

"What if? What if those deep desires in our hearts are telling us the truth, revealing to us the life we were meant to live? God gave us eyes so that we might see; he gave us ears that we might hear; he gave us wills that we might choose, and he gave us hearts that we might live. The way we handle our heart is everything. A man must know he is powerful; he must know he has what it takes. A woman must know she is beautiful; she must know she is worth fighting for... Your heart may feel dead and gone, but its there. Something wild and strong and valiant, just waiting to be released. ... For if you are going to know who you truly are as a man, if you are going to find a life worth living, if you are going to love a woman deeply and not pass on your confusion to your children, you simply must get your heart back. You must head up into the high country of the soul, into the wild and uncharted regions and track down that elusive prey." -John Eldridge, Wild at Heart

"A Time for Remembering" by Ruth Bell Graham
."He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, as one has said, he reaches all the way to heaven. His shoulders 
must be broad enough to bear the burden of a family. His lips must be strong enough to smile, firm enough to say no, 
and tender enough to kiss. Love must be so deep that it takes its stand in Christ and so wide that it takes the 
whole-lost world in. He must be active enough to save souls. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough 
to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a little child." 

patience

You know, patience is a horrible word!  Ha.  I mean this in a good way.  We ask for more patience or better ways of handling our "right now" society.  And then.... God grants that to us by allowing obstacles to get in our way on a busy day, when we're running late, in a traffic jam.  Yep... pretty much.  However, what about our lives?  Are we patient about where God is taking us or when we're going to get there?  A lot of people always say, "It's the journey, not the destination."  Do you really believe that?  I know that I have had struggles with this in the past and off and on now.  My college career ends in 6 days.  Count them: 6!  Where am I going after this?  I don't have a job, I don't have money, I have a place to stay, but nowhere to live on my own.  I am turning 25 this year and I'm pretty much starting at square one.

I am reading this book called "In Step With God".  Each night I read a little more and I'm noticing a pattern.  Uh, patience is written EVERYWHERE!  Well, maybe not in the exact word but in scenarios.  I mean, Noah and the Ark for one.  Yeah, I'm not sure if I could have enough patience to build a boat that size let alone for 120 years!  I would feel like, "Seriously!  Just give it up already!"  But, God does not call us to be of this world.  We are called to glorify Him and if He asks us to wait 120 years before a promise is fulfilled you better believe that I'm going to be on that train!  I'm constantly learning all the time but the best part is, I'm constantly learning what God has for me.  Not necessarily in a job, relationship, living arrangements, or such.. but what He desires me to do in order to serve Him.  I mean, it may be in those things above but if not then I'm okay with that.  It's a big bite to chew, but I'm going to be okay with that, when He asks me to do whatever He does.  I love Him with everything I have... including my nonexistent apartment items.. haha.  So, in order to know what God wants for me?  I must wait, and be patient until He tells me to jump with both feet and as high as I can!  Just look up John Waller's "While I'm Waiting" and that's pretty much what God asks us to do in the mean time.  I'll post those words up too in my next blog.  So wait for God, He has so much planned for you!

Trusting Him in the tough times

Right before bed tonight I said, "Man, God, I really want to blog right now."  So, I went to lay down and picked up my book that I'm currently reading called "In Step with God: Understanding His Ways and Plans for Your Life".  Ha.  Well, first, I started this book because I'm soon ending my chapter of college and have been praying to know what's next with my life.  Well, tonight's emphasis was on trusting Him through the tough times.  I can honestly say, this last week has SUCKED!  Finances, energy down, my knee gives out, my ankle doesn't want to walk, I may have stress fractures in my right foot, my consultant tore me up, my kids aren't listening at school...... you can say that I have not had the best week ever.  But at the same time, I have.  If you read my last blog, I talked about selling all of my stuff... Well, I've advertised them now, so yeah.  But, I realized I was having a difficult time, not getting rid of my stuff, but trusting God with..... EVERYTHING!  I mean, I cannot live this life alone.  I cannot do this without Him.  I am not sure how people do.  Life is tough enough, why put yourself through living it alone!

Anyway, this section of the book was talking about God stretching our faith and trust in Him by allowing things in our lives to take place.  If we choose not to follow Him, then He lets us do it our way for a while and then we go, "Crap... okay, I need You!"  When our whole lives fall apart we need to take a step back and ask ourselves why?  Could it be we're doing something right and Satan is attacking us?  Or could it be that we are not following God in EVERYTHING and so Satan and the world are seeping in?  Satan wants to destroy us no matter what!  If we are following what God commands us to, Satan will try and find ways to do that.  Well, I've had sexual sin in my past (which I'm now free of for four and a half months, by God's grace!) which Satan used.  However, now that I am following God more I have had attacks more now on my integrity, self-esteem, confidence, image (working on this one), future.... you name it.  A lot of this stuff are things that I cannot control (meaning Satan has the control over who tries to destroy these).  I chose the sexual sin that Satan put in front of me... but I don't choose the people or things that attack me.  HOWEVER, I do choose whether or not to allow God to handle it.  Well, last Friday I was not letting Him handle anything.  I can tell you I was falling a part at the seams.  Once I started listening to Him on my long drive home, it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I am not trusting God to handle any of it.... I'm trying to handle it on my own.  God is in control ALL the time.... He doesn't need us to complete His will.  He would LOVE to use us to do so but it's our choice to let Him and listen to Him.  I did decide at the beginning of this week that if God wants me to live on the streets and still go to school, then that's what I'm going to do.  I must trust that He has my future laid out.  I have been guilty of this too, but putting God in a box to fit our standards and life ALWAYS hurt us.  Letting God show us our future through Him ALWAYS blesses us.  Which one do you want?  God gave me the ability to choose this one this week because I let Him in.  Are you letting Him in?  Are you trusting Him with everything you have and more?

catching up

I have not been able to blog a lot lately, though I have such a desire to.  So, I figured while I have a few minutes that I could share with you a little bit on what God has been teaching me lately.  My goodness, He has been teaching me to trust, be faithful, love, obey, stretch (my faith), and rely on Him for everything.  Recently, I have come into a situation with money, living on my own and all, that requires me to sell my possessions.  It's quite funny because I have had Ginny Owens' song stuck in my head. "If You Want Me To".  I truly believe this is for a reason. 

Jesus did call His disciples to take up their cross and follow Him.  He asked them to leave everything behind in order to follow in God's footsteps.  Okay, well, I never really thought I would have to actually leave EVERYTHING behind to do this.  But, I am.  In the past, I thought giving up DVDs was bad.... but sitting here thinking about it, I'm not upset about any of it.  God is teaching me so much about the fact that only He matters.  That He is our constant.  That He is our provider.  I am richer than I realize.  Even giving things away or selling these items still makes me richer than a lot of those who do not have a personal relationship with Him.  I could literally have nothing and have everything I need.  I had been praying a lot lately that God would show me what all of that means.  I now have come to that point.  I am very much humbled by this.  I don't have words to convey how much my heart beats for Him.  So in order to know more about my God, He is asking me to give everything up, literally.  I whole heartedly believe that He wants me to see that He is my all.  He is my provider if I let Him be.  I just need to let Him be God.  I have not done this lately.  I apologize to all of you for that.  Not because I "feel bad" about it.... but because He asks me to ask you for forgiveness.  I have led people astray and misguided them... even if I unintentionally did this.  Living my life out for God and living it so people get to know Him better is what I'm supposed to do.  I am not doing this holding on to everything I own.  I am not telling you this for sympathy, I'm telling you this in hopes and prayers that when God calls you to do something for Him, that you are able to do so.  That you trust Him enough to let go.  I am always working on this. 

Please pray for those who are called into God's work.  Pray for those that are asked to lead by His Word and live by it.  Pray for those who see those obeying God that they will one day be able to take up their cross and leave everything and follow Him.  Praise the Lord for the opportunities that He gives us to show the world who He truly is!

God is amazing

Okay, so I know we all know this.... BUT IT'S SO TRUE!! I have been thinking a lot about my husband lately and how much I am blessed to have him.  God has given me such a great man to fall in love with and be with forever because we both have sought after God's heart.  Now, I don't know him or who he is or what he looks like.  I don't know his name, his likes or dislikes.  His pet peeves, what makes him happy.  I don't know what he's been through or what we're going to go through together.  All I know is that I am so deeply, intensely, genuinely, passionately, severely, profoundly, extremely, completely in love with my God and my husband.  I'm so overwhelmed with emotion and feeling about both of them, I could scream, shout, dance, whatever!  As long as everyone knows that I'm taken by the men in my life that I am so happy to have just for me!  Sigh........ AHHHHHH!!!! I can say.... I am in love. :)

answering to God

Recently, different conversations I have had with different people have been telling on what the world is actually thinking and believing.  I mean, I am almost positive that there are certain things that I think too that probably aren't right and when I know what those are I guarantee the Holy Spirit will tell me.

Anyway, those different people that I talk to have shared with me about looking around them and seeing what others are doing and feeling pressured to do the same.  This could be anything!  Not just the "normal" things that pop in our heads.  But, if you REALLY think about it, who are we answering to at the end of it all?  Are we going to be compared by the people around us when time passes and we are called home?  Not at all.  God is the ultimate judge of how we were able to show the world His love.  I am very much to blame as well when it comes to comparing myself with others.

But, what to do from here on out?  Change.  Obviously, it's much easier said than done but it's possible.  With God's help, anything is possible.  Referring back to Him and allowing Him to take control of our thoughts, feelings, and desires is very difficult to do so but when we do, our thoughts, feelings, and desires change because He is the focus of them.  I could say, "Stop it!  Stop comparing yourself to others!" But, I would be a hypocrite because I do the same thing.  I know that I am going to be praying that God take those away from me.  I pray for you as well that you are able to do so.  The way to change this is to pray and leave it for God.  He can take care of that for us.  We just need to believe and trust that He will.  So, instead of comparing and "answering" to everyone else.... listen to God.  Who cares what they think?!  God is ALWAYS going to be there.... those people?  May not be.  If they believe and turn themselves over to the One true God, then you will see them forever... but even then, no one will care because it's all about serving Him in the end.  I love all of you out there that read about God and are trying to live your life for Him.  And those who are not... I love you too.  I pray for both groups of people, that in the end we remember that answering to God is what will happen in the end and that we will be ready when it does.