replace cravings

So many of us have excuses that we start using the same one over and over again because that creative excuse gene is now wearing out.  "I decide tomorrow will be a much better day to keep my promises to eat healthier."  OR "I'll start on Monday and enjoy the weekend's "rewards"."  OR "I don't have the time to cook, I'm just going to order out."  Have we all had these excuses?  If you said no, you need to take a step back and really look at what you do with your eating habits. 

We use food as a comfort or a filler (bordem) or even a friend.  How do you use food in your life?  I can tell you it was my friend for years.  Now, I think it's something that I've dealt with for so long it's just a hard habit or addiction to break. I'm learning day by day and it's a minute-to-minute battle.  I'm also discovering that God has GOT to be my replacement craving.  That sounds awful because He shouldn't be a replacement anything.  But let's face it... if I'm not giving God the time and I'm giving food the time and when I decide that He's worth my time, then I go to Him.  Sounds like a mouthful but in that sense, He is a replacement!  I need to change that!  Food should never take the place of where God should hold us.  EVER!

One way that Made to Crave has helped me (especially today.. oh my goodness) is that when my cravings start becoming something i cannot control, I need to go to God with it in that moment.  Ask God to help give me the willpower to overcome this craving.  Okay, here's my example from today.  We took the kids bowling for our field trip.  Well, we had to eat lunch right?  The teachers got together and decided to purchase FOUR LARGE PIZZAS!  YEP!  F-O-U-R! And baskets of fries and each person getting a pop!  Well, luckily I knew that we were going on the field trip and I said NO N-O ABSOLUTELY NOT! I had two turkey wraps (turkey, whole grain tortilla shell and squirts of mustard), yogurt, string cheese and an orange!  I sat there with my awesomeness, ha and watched everyone else eat cheesy deliciousness! But is it delicious really?  Sure it can be in the moment and it serves a purpose of feeding the need to have pizza but what does it really do to us afterwards?  What nutritional value is there in greasy pizza?  Ha, changes when you put grease in replacement of cheese doesn't it? 

So my question for you is how are you replacing your cravings?  Here's a better question.... are you an abstainer or a moderator?  Do you need to completely abstain from food in the fact that you'll eat everything in sight (me)? or can you moderate your food?  Have one taste and you're okay?  Which one are you? 

reasons

What are the reasons that you eat?  What emotions do you have when you do eat?  For me?
- comfort - drama
- reward - i lost that weight so i'll reward my efforts
- joy - i enjoy this at this restaurant
- stress - work, finances
- sadness - i'm not worth it
- happiness - get time to myself and enjoying a movie, book or two

If I would have delved myself into reading or bettering myself or listening and reading about God, all those nights would have been more productive.  I would have not ended up here. 

One of my worst things is snacking.  Healthy snacks is something that I need to invest in.  For real. 
Praying through the cravings and not focusing on them or feeding them then I will be stronger each craving.  What have you tried that has helped you through cravings?  What is your success secret?

The one thing too that I've realized is that I need to not reward myself even with a cheat meal until I'm ready to say no every other time.  Once I eat one thing, I justify it later with something else.  This is a great weakness of mine.  I'm prepared to conquer it with God's help and yours as well if you'll join me! 

What weakness do you need help with?  I'd be glad to make sure we both overcome it!

Made to Crave

In the first chapter of Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst, she talks about the kind of cravings that most people tend to have and why they are addicted to them.  Well, it's no one's guess that one of mine is food.  I have a BIG problem with food.  Always have.  However, this first chapter started explaining how you can start to overcome these cravings that seems to be holding onto all of us. 

Cravings can be so overwhelming that sometimes that's all it seems we think about.  I know I've been there and these last few days have really challenged me.  What is your craving and how is it consuming you?  My craving, for some reason, when there is unhealthy food in the house or wherever, I want to eat it.  Why?  Well, I could say at first I had no idea.  Once I read this chapter and started thinking about what my craving was and where it was coming from.  Well, one of the exercises at the end of the chapter was if your craving was talking to you what would it say?  Well, I just started writing really not thinking about it, but here's what I came up with.  Does this sound like you?

- I have always been here when no one else has been.
- I made you feel good for years so why would that change now?
- You need me to feel better about yourself.

Does this sound like you?  Let me tell you this has been me for years!  However, I can tell you that I've found other things that I crave more than food.  I've been setting goals for myself and one is to lose 100 pounds in the next year.  How can I do this when I crave so many awful things?  The things that I'm learning to crave now are God with everything I have AND building a business that has been there for me since day one.  Building business for me though is helping others.  Yeah, the money is nice and that's what helps grow the business but the people IN the business have gotten me through so much and all I want to do is give back!  Instead of giving into the crap that haunts me everyday, I think of these two things!  I hear that voice in my head 1) that says that is going to taste so good and 2) don't eat that because you won't get to your goal, you will be putting food first instead of God, you will be letting yourself down which will take down the other people around you....

What goal can you set for yourself that will help you overcome your cravings and self-doubt?  Write it down and refer to it ALL THE TIME!

priorities

What are your priorities?  I just read the first chapter in a new book that I'm reading called PUSH by Chalene Johnson.  She started out the chapter by telling us that most people who are unhappy with their lives compared to those who are happy and successful are not setting their priorities correctly.  Either they don't have any or they just don't care enough to have them at the top of their list.  One of my priorities is to let God be the center of my life.  This can be tough when the rest of the world gets in the way or tries to anyway because Satan drags you down each time you do something for God or get closer to Him.  It can be extremely tough.  However, Chalene had also asked a series of questions that helped you think about your top priority and why it's important to you and why it should be your top priority.  She also explained that your top three priorities are the things in your life that if you had them stripped from you would don't know what you would do.  Such as family, faith, career, health.... whatever it may be.  For me, I realized nothing else matters unless God is at the center.  I can want SO badly for my career to change and be successful or my body to change so I can finally be different but without Him being in the middle of it all, none of that matters!  You need to WANT that priority to be the center or at the top at all times.  What good is it when it's not?  What good is God to me when I choose not to put Him at the top?  Or let's rephrase that.... what good am I? 

I am NOTHING without Him so why should I live my life any differently?  After you come up with your top priority, you're supposed to write down a paragraph or statement if you will on how you will do this.  I have not perfected mine yet because I want to choose different words to make it stronger to me but my rough draft is "My number one priority is to put God first in all areas of my life.  I will seek Him first though His word, mediation, being silent and listening intently to what His will is for my life.  To show others what the Truth of God is and allow God to work in others' lives as I am just the messenger.  Be a witness of His love, patience, kindness, faithfulness, and joy because He has given those to me.  In return, God's grace and mercy will be shown to those around me and they will see only Him.  My mind, body, and soul will be rejuvenated and restored thank to God's presence in all aspects of my life."

Now, like I said, it'll change a little bit but overall this is my top priority.  What's yours? 

God is in every aspect of life

Okay, I know the title of this seems silly because it really is true.  But sometimes we need that reminder, don't we?  These last few weeks, I've developed old patterns which are not just hurting me physically but mentally and spiritually!  I have the great fortune of having wonderful friends that I've surrounded myself with because God brought them into my life.  Each of them brings something different into my life that is indescribable.  I know for a FACT that those people were meant to be there because God knew I couldn't do what I do without their help.  Obviously, He is the only source to my healthy well-being, physically, spiritually, and mentally.  He does, however, provide those various opportunities and people in your life to show who you can be through Him!  I LOVE THAT! I've been reading and listening to lots of different books and audio lately and let me tell you... first off, it's all common sense I feel but all of it hit me like a ton of bricks because I was actually listening to them this time!  God shows us who He is EVERYDAY! Not just with those around us but look around you at what He's created for us to enjoy!  Hear what people tell you and sometimes yeah, take it with a grain of salt, but listen with an open heart as well in case you may miss something.  Listen to those words sung or spoken around you.  Through the laughter of a child.  Through the calmness of the breeze.  Through the mundane of everyday life... the fact that we have an everyday life... at least for now.  Through the whispers of quiet.  Through the roar of a storm.  Through the fragrance of flowers or the freshly fallen rain.  Where is God around you?  You may not feel Him there, but He is ALL the time!  Where is He?  Are you seeing, feeling, or touching Him?  Are you allowing Him to touch you?  What's holding you back?  What causes you to hesitate?  Embrace all that is around you and ENJOY what He's created for you.  Find the positive through the storm.  Walk around with your head held high because you have a God that LOVES YOU! Show people who gave you that smile!  Show people who gave the passion and desires of your heart!  Show people who created YOU! Do not be afraid to share that with those around you!  For in the end, He's all we have and most importantly all we'll ever NEED!  :)

discouraged?

I heard my pastor on Sunday talk about discouragement.... okay, honestly?  I don't remember what else he said.  I think this part of the sermon was directed towards me not just because I am speaking on motivation this week in our team call but because I needed that reassurance that what I'm doing is because He is asking me to.  I had been discouraged this past week because of certain circumstances that arose.  Then I heard pastor's sermon on how we may feel discouraged but God knows what's going on.  We also may feel uncertain.  Meaning, we may not see the whole staircase in front of us but we need to take the step of faith that we'll reach the bottom becuase He's there to guide us along the way!  That just resonated with me!  It was very powerful!  I may have my spouts of discouragement or uncertainty but WHY? God has everything in His hands.  I may not like the fact that I cannot see everything laid out in front of me but would I want to know what's coming next?  I'm sure we'd all like to say yes because we think of the good things that will happen in our future but what about the others?  Would we want to see the things we have to go through to get to the happy stuff?  I don't want to endure that.  Part of the reason why God doesn't allow us to see everything in our future now is because He knows that we cannot handle it all!  He takes care of it.  We just need to walk in the path that He's laid out for us and He'll walk us through the good and bad times!  So if you're discouraged right now (as was I), remember that God already knows what's to come and He already knows how we're going to handle it.  But, He's still there regardless of what we do or do not do!  Discouraged?  I choose to be blessed that I have today to live for Him!

positivity

As most people know, I'm a very positive person!  I love to smile, laugh, meet new people... you name it!  Now what happens when are you faced with adversity? Does a positive person always stay positive?  No.  Ha.  Well, I am human.  However, how do you get through the hard times?  I can tell you that your attitude can say a whole lot!  Regardless of what you believe in, who you believe in (I believe in the Lord God, in case you were confused ;)), your attitude portrays the type of person you are.  Have you seen a homeless person that is actually happy?  I have.  Have you seen a rich person happy?  Yes.  Have you seen someone who has had their whole life stripped away from them; belongings, family, job, etc., happy?  Yes.   Why?  What in the WORLD do they have to be happy about?  Well, when you constantly believe that there is something better out there for you and you know that this is not it for you?  Your attitude can change drastically.  Your attitude depends on how far you can go in your life.  If you feel defeated and depressed and unhappy ALL the time, then you're probably not going to go anywhere anytime soon.  THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU CANNOT HAVE THESE TIMES! I have them sometimes.  We are human, for goodness sakes.  But when you DWELL in them is when you are going to start having issues. "It's only over when you quit" is what Dave Ramsey says.  So regardless of what situation you're in, you can be happy and positive AND succeed!  It's amazing when you start looking at the positive side of things, how you're life can start to look different.  My challenge is this week, when something seems to be going wrong and it probably will feel that way or even BE that way, I challenge you to look at what good can come out of it?  What can you find that can make that situation turn out better just because you found the positive side of the situation?  I would LOVE to hear your story!   Please let me know what you discover!

an inspiring story

Lately, I've been listening to A LOT and I mean A LOT of Nick Vujicic.  His story is compelling!  It is inspiring and definitely made me want to push myself in my business but more importantly in my life!  I've never heard anything like it and the best part is he's human.  I know sounds silly.  But, most people wonder why he smiles so much.  Well, first it's not always been like that.  People can see the change in him and they want that as well!  AND he finally embraced his disability because he knows that God made him a certain way in order to bring Glory to His name.  One goal in life?  Meet Nick!  Okay, enough intro.. just watch and seriously be inspired!

peace

These last few months have been a whirlwind to say the least!  I miss writing and I need to put it into my schedule since things have been so crazy.  However, the times when you can settle down and just be able to type (write) everything out can be so peaceful.  Just recently, I had so many spiritual battles going on that I didn't know where to start, what emotion to have, what to think.  It was absolutely insane!  However, I started listening and BELIEVING the "voice" that was telling me that first off, everything is alright and second, that I'm worth everything that God has put into making me!  WHO KNEW?! Ha.  Seriously though.  I've heard that all my life (not be conceited, but I have from family).  I have heard that I am worth everything in the world.  I've been told that I'm beautiful.  I've been told that I am stunning.  I've been told that I have talent.  But you know what?  I HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT!  I've also been told that I'm fat, ugly, useless, worthless, dumb, slow, even things like not a great friend (which is to me far worse than all the others, i need a secret desire for people to like me).  You know, it takes 10 nice things for one bad thing to be erased in our thoughts?!  Seriously, it does.  Now, imagine Satan telling you all of the horrible things about yourself constantly!  And you believing.  Nothing on the Earth can take that pain away.  However, GOD can!  God took that pain away and seriously ever since then, I've been on cloud nine!  My life is soaring with business, my spirit is healthier, i actually get things done because I'm not listening to all that, i'm sorry, bull crap!

I feel completely and irrevocably at peace with where I am supposed to be right now!  God has blessed me in more ways than I can count.  I SO want to give that back to people!  I want them to know that feeling because there's nothing like it!  What are you going through?  Are you going through something that you just cannot tell anyone?  Or you've told someone but they just don't seem to care?  Seriously!  What are you going through?  If you need someone to talk to, just to listen and if you want me to give advice or I can even just reassure you that I'm here to listen.  Then please let me know!  You can email me at lmallen86@yahoo.com or find me on facebook at www.facebook.com/lindsay.allen5.  Please let me pray for you!

God is bigger than doubt

You know, these last few months have been a whirlwind.  Been unemployed, been employed, then let go, and jobless while trying to build a business living out of my parents' house that I've lived in since I was born.  Not really a college graduates dream life, right?  Well, I was very much under today.  Well first it was storming outside and quite honestly all I wanted to do was stay under the covers and just sleep through it.  Why?  Probably because Satan was attacking me and telling me that I am not good enough.  Honestly, you cannot tell me that you've never felt this way.  It just plain old sucks!  I was unmotivated, unhappy, depressed... how in the world can this all happen in one day to the next?  I was just fine yesterday!  However, the moment we let our guard down is the moment that we'll come under fire! 

I haven't been in the word the way that I should be or the way that I was back when I was actually extremely busy with work, school, business, trying to build a relationship, and actually studying God's word while living on my own and paying my own bills.  How was that less stressful than sleeping until I feel like getting up, doing basically what I want when I want with nothing really tying me down............ except.............. the fact that two reasons: one) i don't have a job, therefore no money, therefore I'm practically confined to the house, two) God is not present in my everyday life!  So, we're going to fix that!  I read more of Proverbs today.  I read three chapters on Sunday and then read my goal board (a visible place to put my goals so I cannot shy away from them) and it said to be more in the word everyday.  So, I decided to read 5 more chapters of Proverbs.  I truly believe I wasn't supposed to read the Bible yesterday.  I know weird, because God brought me out of my funk today.  He provided the book of the Bible that I needed to read with the chapters on the exact day that I needed them!  PRETTY GOSH DARN COOL, if you ask me! 

God is bigger than doubt.  Not just today but all the time!  Today I was reminded of that regardless of my situation, God is bigger than my issues and self-pity.  He can pull me out of anything I'm in at all times.  Sometimes He lets us "wallow" in it for a while so we can learn to reach out for Him.  When we do, our morale perks up as well as the fact that all of that doubt just disappears.  Are you doubting God today?  Why?  What is keeping you from having that relationship with Him?  It's a day-by-day basis but everyday it's worth letting go to let GOD! 

I seriously need to get back to doing this blog

Like for real... there were two things that hit me today like a ton of bricks... I wanted to share them with you. All they are are quotes but nothing really needs to be explained other than just reading them.  They made me cry!

"What if? What if those deep desires in our hearts are telling us the truth, revealing to us the life we were meant to live? God gave us eyes so that we might see; he gave us ears that we might hear; he gave us wills that we might choose, and he gave us hearts that we might live. The way we handle our heart is everything. A man must know he is powerful; he must know he has what it takes. A woman must know she is beautiful; she must know she is worth fighting for... Your heart may feel dead and gone, but its there. Something wild and strong and valiant, just waiting to be released. ... For if you are going to know who you truly are as a man, if you are going to find a life worth living, if you are going to love a woman deeply and not pass on your confusion to your children, you simply must get your heart back. You must head up into the high country of the soul, into the wild and uncharted regions and track down that elusive prey." -John Eldridge, Wild at Heart

"A Time for Remembering" by Ruth Bell Graham
."He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, as one has said, he reaches all the way to heaven. His shoulders 
must be broad enough to bear the burden of a family. His lips must be strong enough to smile, firm enough to say no, 
and tender enough to kiss. Love must be so deep that it takes its stand in Christ and so wide that it takes the 
whole-lost world in. He must be active enough to save souls. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough 
to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a little child." 

patience

You know, patience is a horrible word!  Ha.  I mean this in a good way.  We ask for more patience or better ways of handling our "right now" society.  And then.... God grants that to us by allowing obstacles to get in our way on a busy day, when we're running late, in a traffic jam.  Yep... pretty much.  However, what about our lives?  Are we patient about where God is taking us or when we're going to get there?  A lot of people always say, "It's the journey, not the destination."  Do you really believe that?  I know that I have had struggles with this in the past and off and on now.  My college career ends in 6 days.  Count them: 6!  Where am I going after this?  I don't have a job, I don't have money, I have a place to stay, but nowhere to live on my own.  I am turning 25 this year and I'm pretty much starting at square one.

I am reading this book called "In Step With God".  Each night I read a little more and I'm noticing a pattern.  Uh, patience is written EVERYWHERE!  Well, maybe not in the exact word but in scenarios.  I mean, Noah and the Ark for one.  Yeah, I'm not sure if I could have enough patience to build a boat that size let alone for 120 years!  I would feel like, "Seriously!  Just give it up already!"  But, God does not call us to be of this world.  We are called to glorify Him and if He asks us to wait 120 years before a promise is fulfilled you better believe that I'm going to be on that train!  I'm constantly learning all the time but the best part is, I'm constantly learning what God has for me.  Not necessarily in a job, relationship, living arrangements, or such.. but what He desires me to do in order to serve Him.  I mean, it may be in those things above but if not then I'm okay with that.  It's a big bite to chew, but I'm going to be okay with that, when He asks me to do whatever He does.  I love Him with everything I have... including my nonexistent apartment items.. haha.  So, in order to know what God wants for me?  I must wait, and be patient until He tells me to jump with both feet and as high as I can!  Just look up John Waller's "While I'm Waiting" and that's pretty much what God asks us to do in the mean time.  I'll post those words up too in my next blog.  So wait for God, He has so much planned for you!

Trusting Him in the tough times

Right before bed tonight I said, "Man, God, I really want to blog right now."  So, I went to lay down and picked up my book that I'm currently reading called "In Step with God: Understanding His Ways and Plans for Your Life".  Ha.  Well, first, I started this book because I'm soon ending my chapter of college and have been praying to know what's next with my life.  Well, tonight's emphasis was on trusting Him through the tough times.  I can honestly say, this last week has SUCKED!  Finances, energy down, my knee gives out, my ankle doesn't want to walk, I may have stress fractures in my right foot, my consultant tore me up, my kids aren't listening at school...... you can say that I have not had the best week ever.  But at the same time, I have.  If you read my last blog, I talked about selling all of my stuff... Well, I've advertised them now, so yeah.  But, I realized I was having a difficult time, not getting rid of my stuff, but trusting God with..... EVERYTHING!  I mean, I cannot live this life alone.  I cannot do this without Him.  I am not sure how people do.  Life is tough enough, why put yourself through living it alone!

Anyway, this section of the book was talking about God stretching our faith and trust in Him by allowing things in our lives to take place.  If we choose not to follow Him, then He lets us do it our way for a while and then we go, "Crap... okay, I need You!"  When our whole lives fall apart we need to take a step back and ask ourselves why?  Could it be we're doing something right and Satan is attacking us?  Or could it be that we are not following God in EVERYTHING and so Satan and the world are seeping in?  Satan wants to destroy us no matter what!  If we are following what God commands us to, Satan will try and find ways to do that.  Well, I've had sexual sin in my past (which I'm now free of for four and a half months, by God's grace!) which Satan used.  However, now that I am following God more I have had attacks more now on my integrity, self-esteem, confidence, image (working on this one), future.... you name it.  A lot of this stuff are things that I cannot control (meaning Satan has the control over who tries to destroy these).  I chose the sexual sin that Satan put in front of me... but I don't choose the people or things that attack me.  HOWEVER, I do choose whether or not to allow God to handle it.  Well, last Friday I was not letting Him handle anything.  I can tell you I was falling a part at the seams.  Once I started listening to Him on my long drive home, it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I am not trusting God to handle any of it.... I'm trying to handle it on my own.  God is in control ALL the time.... He doesn't need us to complete His will.  He would LOVE to use us to do so but it's our choice to let Him and listen to Him.  I did decide at the beginning of this week that if God wants me to live on the streets and still go to school, then that's what I'm going to do.  I must trust that He has my future laid out.  I have been guilty of this too, but putting God in a box to fit our standards and life ALWAYS hurt us.  Letting God show us our future through Him ALWAYS blesses us.  Which one do you want?  God gave me the ability to choose this one this week because I let Him in.  Are you letting Him in?  Are you trusting Him with everything you have and more?

catching up

I have not been able to blog a lot lately, though I have such a desire to.  So, I figured while I have a few minutes that I could share with you a little bit on what God has been teaching me lately.  My goodness, He has been teaching me to trust, be faithful, love, obey, stretch (my faith), and rely on Him for everything.  Recently, I have come into a situation with money, living on my own and all, that requires me to sell my possessions.  It's quite funny because I have had Ginny Owens' song stuck in my head. "If You Want Me To".  I truly believe this is for a reason. 

Jesus did call His disciples to take up their cross and follow Him.  He asked them to leave everything behind in order to follow in God's footsteps.  Okay, well, I never really thought I would have to actually leave EVERYTHING behind to do this.  But, I am.  In the past, I thought giving up DVDs was bad.... but sitting here thinking about it, I'm not upset about any of it.  God is teaching me so much about the fact that only He matters.  That He is our constant.  That He is our provider.  I am richer than I realize.  Even giving things away or selling these items still makes me richer than a lot of those who do not have a personal relationship with Him.  I could literally have nothing and have everything I need.  I had been praying a lot lately that God would show me what all of that means.  I now have come to that point.  I am very much humbled by this.  I don't have words to convey how much my heart beats for Him.  So in order to know more about my God, He is asking me to give everything up, literally.  I whole heartedly believe that He wants me to see that He is my all.  He is my provider if I let Him be.  I just need to let Him be God.  I have not done this lately.  I apologize to all of you for that.  Not because I "feel bad" about it.... but because He asks me to ask you for forgiveness.  I have led people astray and misguided them... even if I unintentionally did this.  Living my life out for God and living it so people get to know Him better is what I'm supposed to do.  I am not doing this holding on to everything I own.  I am not telling you this for sympathy, I'm telling you this in hopes and prayers that when God calls you to do something for Him, that you are able to do so.  That you trust Him enough to let go.  I am always working on this. 

Please pray for those who are called into God's work.  Pray for those that are asked to lead by His Word and live by it.  Pray for those who see those obeying God that they will one day be able to take up their cross and leave everything and follow Him.  Praise the Lord for the opportunities that He gives us to show the world who He truly is!

God is amazing

Okay, so I know we all know this.... BUT IT'S SO TRUE!! I have been thinking a lot about my husband lately and how much I am blessed to have him.  God has given me such a great man to fall in love with and be with forever because we both have sought after God's heart.  Now, I don't know him or who he is or what he looks like.  I don't know his name, his likes or dislikes.  His pet peeves, what makes him happy.  I don't know what he's been through or what we're going to go through together.  All I know is that I am so deeply, intensely, genuinely, passionately, severely, profoundly, extremely, completely in love with my God and my husband.  I'm so overwhelmed with emotion and feeling about both of them, I could scream, shout, dance, whatever!  As long as everyone knows that I'm taken by the men in my life that I am so happy to have just for me!  Sigh........ AHHHHHH!!!! I can say.... I am in love. :)

answering to God

Recently, different conversations I have had with different people have been telling on what the world is actually thinking and believing.  I mean, I am almost positive that there are certain things that I think too that probably aren't right and when I know what those are I guarantee the Holy Spirit will tell me.

Anyway, those different people that I talk to have shared with me about looking around them and seeing what others are doing and feeling pressured to do the same.  This could be anything!  Not just the "normal" things that pop in our heads.  But, if you REALLY think about it, who are we answering to at the end of it all?  Are we going to be compared by the people around us when time passes and we are called home?  Not at all.  God is the ultimate judge of how we were able to show the world His love.  I am very much to blame as well when it comes to comparing myself with others.

But, what to do from here on out?  Change.  Obviously, it's much easier said than done but it's possible.  With God's help, anything is possible.  Referring back to Him and allowing Him to take control of our thoughts, feelings, and desires is very difficult to do so but when we do, our thoughts, feelings, and desires change because He is the focus of them.  I could say, "Stop it!  Stop comparing yourself to others!" But, I would be a hypocrite because I do the same thing.  I know that I am going to be praying that God take those away from me.  I pray for you as well that you are able to do so.  The way to change this is to pray and leave it for God.  He can take care of that for us.  We just need to believe and trust that He will.  So, instead of comparing and "answering" to everyone else.... listen to God.  Who cares what they think?!  God is ALWAYS going to be there.... those people?  May not be.  If they believe and turn themselves over to the One true God, then you will see them forever... but even then, no one will care because it's all about serving Him in the end.  I love all of you out there that read about God and are trying to live your life for Him.  And those who are not... I love you too.  I pray for both groups of people, that in the end we remember that answering to God is what will happen in the end and that we will be ready when it does.

love

I've discovered lately that too many people put emphasis on the fact that love is expressed only through sex.  It's not.  I actually feel sad for those who believe this.  Love is something that is expressed by the way we treat each other, by the way we SHOULDN'T treat other, and as Josh Harris puts it, "by self-control, patience and even words left unsaid."  Love is not a one-size fits all kind of program.  It's shown in various forms.  God expresses His loves in more ways than I will ever be able to recall.  One way, at least for me, that God shows His love for me is when I sit and I am just listening and He talks to me the way that I have known my Earthly father to talk with me.  He shares with me His love for me and His plans for my life (not necessarily in detail).  I feel comfort when things are horribly wrong; I feel happiness when I have done nothing but enjoy His creation; I feel love when I need someone to hold me.  He is everything to me.  Notice He does not express His love in the superficial ways that many humans think that love needs to be expressed.  He is the best way to find out what Love is all about. 

For me, loving God is loving others before myself.  Serving them the way that He has called me to serve.  I will screw up.  There is no getting around it.  But, showing them who God is by the way I react, or treat them, or care for them, even giving them the best of whatever it may be, and I take the second hand.  An example of the last is something simple even, taking the back seat and giving them the front seat of the car.  Not giving yourself the best.  Newsflash, you already have the best.  You are just able to show others what that is by the way that you love them.  It's amazing the response that you may get when someone notices.  Now remember, you don't want them to notice something YOU did.... it's what God is doing.  You are just being used to show who He is.  When someone says, "You are such a sweet person for doing that."  I just reply, "Thank you."  I always thank God that they were able to see Him through something so simple.  You never have to "go big or go home."  You can show God through the little things and people will be just as impressed.... with God.  Being humble is what Jesus did.  He was on this Earth to put Himself below others.  He was a humble man.  He did not proclaim it, He just was.  He referred back to God when someone commented on Him.  It wasn't Him, it was God.  I know that if He had the choice, He would not have died on the cross for us.  I mean, He did pray that it be taken away from Him if there was another way.  But, because He chose to follow God, He did as God asked.  He loved God so He loved us to die for us.  THAT is Love.

I Kissed Dating Goodbye

Okay, so I've been reading "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris.  It's such a great book!  However, I did realize that the title is not quite what he means.  So, when I read through it, "dating" made much more sense to me.  One of the main ideas that he portrays in his book, is how many people have you given yourself to?  It does not necessarily mean physically.  But, emotionally as well.  How many people have you invested your time in instead of investing your time in God?  So instead of "dating" people, date God! 

I love this idea because we are supposed to be living our lives out FOR God so why not invest the time that you have in the person that is going to be with you for eternity?  I started looking at my life and the men that I've invested my time in (not many, but there are still a few) and how those people helped me prevent giving my WHOLE heart to someone that I will love with everything I am.  Not just my husband, but my God!  I have allowed people and things to get in the way of the one true thing in my life.  Now, how have you done?  What have you invested your time in that has prevented you from growing closer to God? 

I am learning that the person that I am supposed to be with will never ask of me something that God does not see fit.  He will love me the way that God loves me (and obviously in the best way he can).  He will encourage my walk with God even if that means, that he needs to be on the sidelines waiting for the right time that God (coach) puts Him in to play the game.  I have asked myself.... are you trying to satisfy yourself?  Are you trying to let God handle ANYTHING?  Is He the center of the decisions you make or an afterthought?  With potential relationships, are you making sure that God is the focus and not the relationship at hand?  What is the motive?  I do want a husband and children........ someday.   Right now, since I do not have either, I want to serve God the best way I know how.  I want to obey Him when He calls me to do something, or even asks me in such a way that only I can understand.  People on Earth will never understand your relationship with God.  And honestly, they're not supposed to.  It's your relationship with God.  They need to have their own.  However, if you (I) live my life out to please God, then nothing else matters.  Those people have seen a difference in the way that I choose to live because God IS my life.  I am so thankful that they see that.  I thank Him that He has been able to show Himself even through the crap I do.  This is a great witness.  Even living your life out in a way that is pleasing to God, is a great witness to the magnitude of His mercy and grace and love.  So are you choosing to live a life for the One who saved yours?  Or give your life away to anyone or anything to please your gratification?  I know which one I want to choose and I know which one I will fall into sometimes.  But, picking yourself up and repenting and regaining that is the life of a Christian.  I pray you do the same.

selfish surrender

This title may seem strange to read but this can be so completely true.  Why do you choose to surrender whatever you are called to surrender to God?  Is it possessions?  Singleness?  Finances?  Family?  What is God calling you to surrender?  Now, when He asks us to surrender, did you know that we are not supposed to bargain with God?  Many decide that when they surrender their desires to God that He will automatically return the favor in fulfilling the desires almost as soon as the desires are His again.  Um, not true.  There are so many out there (and I cannot explain this to any of them without hurt on the other side) that believe that when they give something to God, that they are going to expect something almost immediately in return.  A lot of the reason why God asks us to give things to Him is so that we can selfLESSLY serve Him.  When we expect Him to give us our desires back in a timely manner then we are not holding God to the standard that He calls us to.  God promised us that He would be with us if we gave our everything to Him.  He did not promise comfort, security, marriage, family, wealth.  None of that.  He just promised that He would walk with us every step of the way.  When we start putting God in a box that He is automatically going to pull through because you gave something up to Him, then He will probably hold out that completing or giving back our desires because we actually have not given Him everything.  We still hold out that as soon as we "stop looking" then it's going to be given to us.  Ha.  I have done this and sometimes still do.  But, have you noticed that nothing has happened yet?  It's probably because you still have one eye looking around instead of both on God.  Like I said I do this too.  When we surrender anything and everything to Him, He wants us to give our all, not just part of it.  So we need to give and surrender selflessly.  Surrendering selflessly basically means to give God everything and just live for Him.  Not holding out hope that the future that you have been waiting for is right around the corner.  But, more living your life that whatever happens is all for the glory of Him.  When we basically forget about the world and live for Him, SELFLESSLY, that's when He is able to grant our desires because He knows that we don't NEED those, but He wants to bless us with them because we are faithfully following His commands.  So, I will challenge myself as well as you to selflessly surrender your life and your all to the glory of God's kingdom.

giving things up for God

I miss my family.  I'll shout it from the rooftops if I could see them today.  I have not seen them in almost two months.  I know that sounds insane but seriously, we are all so close.  I cannot imagine how my brother and sister-in-law do it (they live in North Carolina).  All I want to do is get a hug from my parents and kiss on my nieces and nephews and just be able to SEE my family.

I was lying in my bed thinking about them when, of course, I started getting teary-eyed.  I heard God ask me, "What would happen if they were not here tomorrow?"  That is when I started bawling.  I could not imagine my life without my family the way that it is now!  I miss them terribly, but what would happen if I no longer had them at all?  Why was God asking me this question?  Why was He putting me through the possibility of never seeing my family again, when that is all I longed for?!  But, I suddenly realized, He wasn't putting me through any of that to put me through pain, He was asking me could I live with only God in my life?  Was I able to give all of these people who mean so much to me, to God?  I not only have been purging my life of things that mean nothing to be but God was asking me to give those who are dearest to me over to Him.  That is a hard pill to swallow.

I am sure as parents, most people would say that they needed to be with their children all the time just to make sure that their children were safe.  Trust me, I just had this conversation with my mother.  But, God does not ask us to hold on to those thins.  He actually asks us to give those things over to Him because He has a plan for those people.  He asks us to trust that He is taking care of them.  Who better to take care of those that we hold dearest to us, than Him?  That night I felt a peace of knowing that if my family were gone tomorrow, that I will still be satisfied with just God.  I say that like it's a bad thing.  I will be satisfied with Just God!  How can I live a life WITHOUT God?  So, I am satisfied with God.  I don't need anything else.  I want those people in my life because I love them so much it hurts.  But, being asked that question brought a new perspective in my life that I never thought possible.  He not only was asking me to give those people over to Him but He was asking me to give ME over to Him.  Ha.  Gladly!  Thank you God for asking me the difficult questions so I know that You are who I can lean on. :)

Are you satisfied with only God?

I have been asking myself this question for some time now.  Not only with earthly relationships but with everything in general.  Am I really satisfied with only God?  I have to honestly say that I am scared to have only God because I have not known that part of my life for very long.  I'm being honest right?  What about you?  Are you scared for it to only be you and God?  Can you give you your life of comfortablility if He asked you to? 

Many people shy away from this question because they don't want to give up what they know.  Well, if God is asking you to give up everything, then you better do it.  This does not mean that God asks everyone to give up all of their belongings, friendships, family, life all the time.  I mean, He has the authority to do so but that does not mean that is right for you.  He could ask me tomorrow to sell or give away all of my possessions and live in a cardboard box.  This is when I ask myself, am I able to do this?  I will admit that this is a scary thought and I do selfishly still want to hang on to a few things because it's what I know.  But, this past week I started looking at what I own in my tiny apartment and realized that most of my stuff, I never use.  Then why do I have it?  I am not saying any of this to put myself on a pedestal.  I do, however, want you to think about why you have what you have?  I went through my items, and got rid of what I don't use or what I have not used in a while and packed up all of it.  I logically asked myself, "Am I keeping this because it glorifies God?"  There are a few things I kept because as an educator (or future educator) I am going to need some things to teach my kids.  There are also things I kept that if people came over that they would feel comfortable and I can show them who God is.  Other than those two reasons, I pretty much got rid of what I didn't need.  It's a tough thing to do but let me tell you, it is so liberating.  So, my question is are you completely satisfied with only God?

Valentine's Day

Okay, so I know I'm a few days late on this post but that's okay.  Better late than never.  But, speaking of Valentine's Day and all the craziness about it.  First of all, I have never been big on Valentine's Day... probably because it always reminds me that the person I am going to be spending it with is not here right now.  But, I realized something tonight.  For those of you who are single and hate Valentine's Day, write your loved one a letter!  Seriously!  In a way, you get to surprise them with it in the future and you get to talk to your future spouse!  So, instead of looking at Valentine's Day as something to mourn over, I decided to take action and use if for a better cause.  Yeah, I did spend Valentine's Day physically alone, but first of all it was amazing!  I watched a dramatic movie, ate chocolate filled with caramel, drank sparkling grape juice and had a crazy Mexican meal!  And, then?  I wrote my future husband a Valentine's Day love letter!  So, all of you who are single, write or do something for your future Valentine!  Do something special and then put it in a keepsake box to give it to them when the time comes around!  I cannot wait to see his face when he opens it.  That I've waited this long to give him a little letter.  But, it'll mean that much more to him when he opens it. 

Also, remember that God loves you more than you could ever imagine.  So, when you think you don't have a valentine to spend the day with, remember that you can spend ALL DAY with God, no matter where you are and have the best valentine.  No one can compare with that!

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Hillsong's "The Stand"

This song hit me hard today!  As in I was cleaning my apartment and then I had to stop because I was completely overwhelmed by God.  It is amazing how He can pull us out of the mundane routine of life and show us who He is.  Amazing!

You stood before creation
Eternity in Your hand
And You spoke the earth into motion
My soul now to stand
You stood before my failure
And carried the cross for my shame
My sin weighed upon your shoulders
My soul now to stand

So what could I say?
And shat can I do?
But offer this heart, oh God
Completely to you

So I walk upon salvation
Your spirit alive in me
This life to declare your promise
My soul now to stand.

So I'll stand
With arms high and heart abandoned
In awe of the one who gave it all
So I'll stand
My soul Lord to you surrendered
All I am is yours

Jesus dying for us

Today I was consumed by the the presence of God.  I was asked to sing in church by two good friends of mine and we started singing "How Great Thou Art" and the message in this hymn hit me.  I was overwhelmed by the image of Jesus, our Savior, up on the cross with all of my baggage and turmoil on His shoulders.  I got extremely emotional. 

However, hours later I was talking to another friend of mine on how much Christ loves us that He would die for us.  And she had given the analogy of a friend dying for someone else if a gun was pointed at them.  I liked the analogy but then I went a bit further in saying that not only did He jump in front of the bullet for us..... but He jumped in front of the bullet 6+ billion times!  AND THEN, He jumped in front of the bullet 6+ billion times multiplied by the amount of sin each of us carry around.  Huh..... Could you do that for a friend?  Someone you loved?  Could you jump in front of a bullet for them EVERY TIME they sinned against you with no questions asked?  Could you? 

Jesus WILLINGLY died each and every time we do something against Him.  That's why He died.  To rescue us from those sins.  The burden you feel from a sin you have committed in any way, imagine your sin, upon all your other sins, upon 6+ billion people's sins multiplied by their sins.... the burden that you feel is NOTHING compared to how He must have felt holding all of those upon Himself.  AND THEN, He prayed for us and asked God to forgive us for KILLING JESUS!  I don't want to kill my Savior anymore!  I know that I will sin, logically, but I really don't want to!  I drove the nail through His feet, the nails through His wrists, the thorns on His head, the lashings He received, the blood dripping down His body to form a pool under Him, I made Him carry that cross to Calvary, I made Him cry out FOR ME!! I made Him do ALL of that!  I DID THAT!  Those mocking Him as they watched Him dying.... that was me.  I was there.  I killed Him.  I sit here with tears forming in my eyes...... I should be the one to die.  I should be the one to be crucified for what I have done to Him.  The wager for Sin IS DEATH!  It is!  It was and will always be death.  I do NOT deserve the grace, love, compassion, mercy that God shows me.  HE GIVES IT TO ME!  Do you show grace, love, compassion, mercy to those around you?  Do you show them who Jesus really is?  Or do you get frustrated with the slow driver?  Or the cashier who is taking her sweet time?  Or the people who curse you, hate you, scorn you because you walked in the wrong direction at the wrong time?  What do you do with those people?  What they do to you and me will NEVER compare to what we did and do to Jesus when we choose the world over Him. 

Could you jump in front of a bullet for Jesus? 

surrendering to God

I constantly learn more and more about God's love and mercy every day.  Today was definitely one of those days and it was a long one but so fulfilling.  I often wonder by living my every day life, am I really surrendering everything I have to Him?  It is hard to figure out where that "line" is with what we are comfortable giving up to God.  However, in reality, are we supposed to feel "comfortable" at all?  Isn't being comfortable where we got ourselves today?  Being comfortable actually can be harmful to us.  You think Jesus was comfortable when He laid His life down for us?  You think the His disciples were comfortable when nearly all of them were tortured and eventually killed for spreading the Gospel?  I believe feeling comfortable would have kept them from doing any of that.  Being comfortable would have prevented us from knowing who God was because I'm pretty sure that if they were comfortable, they wouldn't have written the Word of God without being scorned... right (if that were the least of it) or killed for it. 

So, the real question is how do you surrender? The easy answer is seek the Lord.  Immerse yourself in His Word.  Submit yourself to good, godly teaching, and counsel.  Ask for prayer.  Ask for help.  Open your heart to the work of the Holy Spirit.  Look back at these words again.  Does any one of these sentences say, "But, if you feel uncomfortable with any of this.  It's okay, I'm sure we can work something out."  I didn't think so.  Now, it is not wrong to feel "comfortable" in your life.  I mean, we need jobs to purchase necessities and pay bills and afford to raise our children, right?  I mean, God does not say that you can't live with these, ever.  But, when we start relying on THOSE instead of Him, that's when we need to come to the realization that there is something wrong. 

I recently have discovered that I have a heart for the orphans and I was not sure where to go, who to talk to, which organizations to look at, if I am supposed to be in country or out?  I mean, there is a lot to think about.  I realized tonight that I can do as much research about different organizations as I can.... but other than longing more and more to go out and serve the orphans, where is that really getting me?  Once again, I am not saying that it is wrong to do that.  It is wrong to consume your life with those instead of God.  The last couple of days, I have been so excited to go out that I wasn't listening to God.  God says right now that I have to wait.  I am okay with this.  I know that I am supposed to serve orphans, now it's just on His timing.  So, as I wait for my assignment, I sit patiently, waiting, seeking, praying, reading, serving God in anything I can do right now, even if I am uncomfortable with waiting.  But, leaning on God to do the dirty work is so much better than trying to get that done on my own, when I know that my plans are not even close to as amazing as what He has planned for me.  So, I am surrendering to God.

dating

(DISCLAIMER: This is a long blog! but totally worth the information)

For those of you who are single, I have some more good information for you!  I was listening to Mark Driscoll last night and part of his "Religion Saves" series.  I decided to focus on dating since so many of my friends are going through this process right now.  It was a good sermon.  I recommend it.  Anyway, Mark not only focuses on the whole dating process but shares with both men and women how to prepare yourself for a marriage with your future spouse.  So, I am going to share my notes with you on what I have learned yesterday and I hope that it helps you all out there who have questions about the kind of person that you should be looking for and how to prepare yourself for them.  Here goes:

Let's start out with single men, since I obviously know more about single women... so I can go more into detail with them.

If you're a single man there are numerous questions that you could be asking yourself about either your relationship with Christ or what you are looking for in your future spouse.

There are many single men out there that are trying to figure out why they cannot find a good Christian girl.  Well, first of all have you looked around you lately?  There could be a great single gal that you are overlooking because either you don't see her that way or you just never thought about it.  It's really okay to just see where things go.  If they're not interested, just move on.  Really, not every girl that you ask out or pursue is going to be with you.  You are only supposed to be with one woman anyway, right?  So, really it's okay! 

Now, outside of the available women around you, ask yourself questions about you.  Much like, will you honor her and God as if Jesus were physically present?  Many men (Christian and non Christian) take advantage of alone time.  So here is a foreshadowing.... don't be alone with those women in a secluded space.  You will honor them by showing respect and honor yourself by showing self-control.  It works.  Trust me, girls actually want a respectable guy. 

And because of this, you also want to ask if she's modest.  If she is not modest and she flaunts herself to the WHOLE room, then that is not a girl for you.  Honestly, she may nice to look at but she is also easy to every other guy.  You don't want a girl that wants everyone else to look at her.  You want a girl that wants YOU to look at her.  Though most girls this day in age have a hard time giving up their independence, it does call for them to be submissive to their husbands, Biblically.  BUT, this does not mean "Woman do what I say!"  You must also respect her, cherish her and honor her.  You are a partnership, not a dictatorship. 

Can you provide for her?  If you have a job that only pays the bills and the necessities in life, you definitely don't want a woman that is high maintenance and has to live in a castle with butlers.  Seriously!  You want to be able to be with someone who you can provide for and live comfortably. 

Does she have character?  Not only does she have a good personality.  I mean you want to be attracted to her.  But, does she have the character of Christ or does she have a character like Proverbs says to not be a nagging wife.  You don't want one of those.  So look to see if she has the characteristics of Christ.

Now on to the single gals!

There are numerous girls that I have recently spoken to who have a hard time "being submissive" to their husbands.  I am learning what this means and most of today's culture does not understand this.  The scripture, the majority of the time, is taken way out of context.  She is supposed to be submissive to her husband but they are a UNIT; they are ONE.  The man is supposed to leave his family to join in UNION with his wife.  This does not say, a man is supposed to RULE over her and tell her what to do.  It also does not say, that a woman is supposed to be a DOOR MAT.  Never!  This is NOT what scriptures tells us.  We were made to be helpers of our husbands and together we are BOTH supposed to serve each other.

Now that I have this cleared out of the way... there are some questions you can ask yourself and of your potential husbands as well.

Do you want to help him?  How about in his ministry?  As a husband/wife team, you can be very powerful in the spreading of the Gospel.  You want to be able to do what God calls you to do and support your husband in ministry.  This does not mean that you cannot have your own part in ministry.  There are many wives of ministers or clergy, that serve in the church and help the single gals, or children's ministry, or worship ministry.... or really what you are called to do.  Just as you support him in his ministry, he should be supporting you as well.

Is he tough enough to remain during the hardships?  If you are with a guy and he flees when you have a disagreement or let's say that he gets you pregnant (which I pray DOES NOT happen), is he going to stick by your side or is he going to be a coward and hide under a rock?  You don't want your future spouse to be missing when you need to work out a problem together; you'll be on your own.  You want a strong, spiritual leader for your family.

Do you feel safe with him?  If he is commanding, pushing you around, abusive.... then he's definitely not a man and needs to be out of that relationship.  Only cowards treat their families (girlfriends) that way.  If he were a goo Christian man, then he would respect, honor, and cherish you even through difficult times.  If you feel unsafe with him EVER then you need to rethink that relationship.

Will he be a good daddy?  One way to see if this is true, is to step back and watch him with kids.  You don't always have to wait to be married to the guy to see where his values with kids lie.  You can observe him outside of a relationship.  Obviously, if he looks like he's annoyed with kids, he needs to probably grow up before starting a relationship.  If he seems to love them around and gets along great with them, then there could be major potential there.

Is he a one-woman man?  Is he dating around when you are with him?  Or if you are not with him but you see he's dating more than one girl... then he's not a keeper.  What makes you think that when he's with you that he's not going to be seeing other girls?  You don't want that kind of relationship where trust is never earned before the relationship even starts.  So to remove the heartache, just don't get involved in the first place.

How much of a treasure are you to him? Make him earn it.  Too many girls give themselves away WAY TOO fast.  As soon as they start talking to a guy, they give all the juicy details before your name is even remembered.  SLOW DOWN!! Girls are emotional beings... that's how God created us.  Now, we need to make the guys earn us.  Does he show you off to his friends?  Or does he hide you in the bushes when they come his direction?  Does he go out and find a job to help pay his bills?  Or does he sit in his mother's basement and sleep all day to wait to hang with the guys at night?  It's pretty simple to tell whether or not he's ready for a commitment.

Do you want your sons to be like him?  I want my children AND my future husband to be like my dad.  Honestly, I do.  This is what you want for your family.  You want your sons to have a great role model for them to grow up and be good, solid, God-fearing men.  Just as you want your daughters to know what a good, solid, God-fearing man looks like.  If he's not this, then your future will look pretty grim.

This is basically what I learned and I hope that this helps a lot for those of you who have questions about dating and what to do or what not to do when you have relationship potential with someone.  When that time comes around for me.  I can guarantee you, that I will be looking this blog up!

we do our part and God does the rest

Sometimes it is hard to go through life and witness to those around you and you feel like you're getting nowhere.  But, God can use something as small as a speck of sand to change someone's life.  That's why He says if we have faith as small as a mustard seed, we can move mountains.  It can be frustrating when those around us do not get what we are "teaching" or "sharing" with them.  I have been known to raise my voice in the past out of frustration because no one understood what I was trying to get across to them.  In this act, we tend to also judge those around us.  Now, remember that God is not a logical God, God is faith.  Something may not make sense to us or others around us but when we do what He calls us to, then it doesn't matter what those say around us.  "If you are here to judge, then you're not doig what God wants for you."  Some Christians tend to forget that God is the one that judges those in the end.  We just have to do the job of sharing the Gospel in prayers and hope that those get saved that we have talked to and have a personal relationship with God.  However, I cannot SAVE someone.  That is NOT my job.  My job is to love people where they are at.  My job is to be there for those that need me in His name.  My job is to do what God has called me to do.  My job is not to save.  I CANNOT DO THAT!! God can!  I just lead those people in the direction that God wants them to start heading and if they choose to then they choose to.  If not, I keep praying that someone else can plant a seed as well.  I just watched this movie Lord Save Us and the pastor said, "When we love those which is what we're supposed to do, God shows up." I totally agree with this.  We alone cannot save people, but with the help of God we can lead them in the right direction so He can save them.  So do your part, as in, do what God has called you to do and love those around you (even if it hurts) and let God do the rest!

how much do we really know?

I was sitting on my couch watching TBN and there was a movie playing called Lord Save Us (the movie).  I was realizing how sad it really is to the fact that most Christians barely know about those around them.  There had a been a short game show in this movie.  They had nonbelievers on one side and believers on another.  The nonbelievers beat the believers by a good 300 points.  How sad is this?  We know more about ourselves (and that isn't much either) compared to what we know about those around us.  Those nonbelievers know more about us than we know about them.  And what they know about us is generally negative.  So many of us want to reach those around us so bad that we shove the Word and Bible down the throats of those around them and we have no clue who THEY are.  Jesus worked His ministry to know those He ministered to.  He ate with them, hung with them, sat with them, worked with them.  He was showing who His Father was through getting to know them and caring about their needs instead of His own.  I wish I could say that I do this but this is far from the truth.  Though, I am learning and headed in this direction.  I think it's sad that nonbelievers know more about us than we do them and they STILL do not want a part of it.  We are supposed to be a reflection of who Christ is in our lives and if those around us do not want to be apart of that then there is a huge problem. 

I just sat here being convicted to write about this and notify those out there that do read this that there is a huge problem with Christianity if we are PUSHING people away instead of making them feel welcomed into the Body of Christ.  I pray that I can work on this starting now and I pray that our nation and world will feel the same conviction and pray to allow God to work in their lives as well as those around them.

lordsavusthemovie.com

The Gospel of love

Did you know the Gospel of love is something everyone actually wants?  Atheists, agnostics, Muslims, and all the other religions or denominations want to hear the good news.  Did you know that it's not hearing the about Jesus and the Bible that turn people off?  Guess what turns them off.  That's right, us.  We get in the way of Jesus getting through because we have to be right.  Not all Christians are right.  Some of us are completely wrong.  Believe it or not, it is not our job to be right.  It's Jesus' job to be right and us just love people into the Kingdom.  He need to be humble and loving like Jesus is because that says so much more than those who argue their point all the time.  We get caught up in "trying to save people" that we fail to realize that we are NOT the ones doing the saving.  We are a vessel that God uses to show people who He is.  Not us using God to show who we are.  I have been having issues lately on trying to reach those for the sake of Jesus.  But did you know that He does not NEED us?  He never has.  He CHOOSES us to glorify Him.  So in order to reach those for Jesus, we need to love them into the Kingdom.  We need to be humble and kind just like Jesus is.  So use the Gospel of love as a ministry instead of a soapbox.  I'll be challenging myself in this as well, so let's see how God can work through us with us giving our pride to Him and letting Him do the work through us.

learning more and more

Today I have learned so much about Jesus that I don't think I've cried this much in such a long time.  I cry for my sin, His forgiveness, my selfishness, my joy, His overwhelming love, my new found understanding.  I cry because He is who He is.  I have not only learned more about Jesus today then I ever thought possible, but I have learned and feel peaceful about handing my EVERYTHING to Him.  My schooling, my career, my ministry, my love, my life.  It's so amazing the things you can learn when you actually choose to let Jesus do His job.  He cares for me more than I ever thought.  There are not enough emotions and words in this world to convey how much He cares for me.  He does want the best from me and for me.  Logically, I knew this but today, I believed it and want to live it out.  I know there are going to be hard times in my life where my questions will constantly come, but I now know my faith will never be shaken.  There are people in my life, I already know, that are not going to agree with decisions I make.  However, I know I am not making those decisions.  God has already made them, I just have to learn to and take up my cross and follow Him each and every day.  I have more in my life right now than some people will ever see.  I am a selfish person.  I discovered today, I do not want to be that way.  God does not call me to be selfish.  He calls me to serve.  I just cannot wait to see what Journey He has for me.  I am so in love with God right now I want to shout and scream for the all the world to hear.  He is my Savior, my Knight in shining Armor, my Healer, my Best Friend, my Confidant, My King! 

living life with God

This is such a big topic to speak on because I know so many people who are going through this right now.  But, I realized almost 6 months ago that I needed to put God in my life first.  The way I started doing this was to read more and more about Him.  I can assuredly say, that some Christians live a life of "well, if I do what God wants me to do then I'm fine".  YES!!! And there's more.  Those Christians live out a life that is pleasing to God in certain aspects.  But, what we tend to forget is that not only do we need to be Acting our faith out we need to be reading and studying it as well.  Reading and studying the Word of God is a big step.  But, it keeps you accountable with God EVERYDAY.  You are not just trying to live a good life but you're reading on how to apply God's Word in your life.  I realized tonight that I was somewhat reading the Word of God but I was really not getting what it said.  I was not studying my Bible.  How can I live a life for God if I do not know what the Bible says?  There are many people, I just read about them, that can live their life for God without the Bible.  These people are given the Word of God in their hearts because they do not have access to a Bible.  So those who have access to a Bible, like myself, what do you do with it?  Do you let it sit on your shelf and gather dust?  Do you give it to others to read and just leave yourself out of it?  Or do you pick up your Bible everyday and see what God has for you to learn and apply to your life?  I know I have not been the most diligent Bible reader for a while.  But in order for a person to be a better believer in Christ there must be ongoing reading and bible studies.  There should always be some kind of studying God's Word incorporated into your life; single or otherwise.  This will help you through your times of trials and tribulations when you do not have that physical, Earthly person there to pray with you.  But this will also help you when you are in a relationship on how to serve God better together.  Since, I am not with anyone right now, I plan on delving myself into the Word because God is my someone.  We all need Him.  So what are you going to do with your Bible?

p90x time

Okay, so today, I decided (for real) that I am done with this whole weight issue thing.  I worked out with a friend and then I worked out by myself for an hour.  It's actually very refreshing.  Anyway, the reason why I am writing this because I discovered something that Tony Horton said on the video that totally pertains to a Christian's life, whether he knows that or not.  He was talking, at the end of the workout, about how difficult it is to workout the way that we desire to when it's at the beginning of our journey.  He said that once you workout everyday and exercise your body, then it gets so much easier as time goes on.  Then not only will you be able to challenge yourself but you can do what you've already done and then some.  I was listening to him and it was like a revelation.  I am learning about myself and my relationship with God everyday.  I am learning so much more then I ever thought possible AND THERE IS STILL MORE TO GO!!

But, anyway, I realized that at the beginning of our Journey, it is one of the toughest things in the world.  Or even a hard time that we are facing.  We must exercise our faith and relationship with God in order to make it through those tough times.  No matter how difficult it is going to be, you will be able to go past it and then you are able to conquer even more difficult things with time.  Exercising your faith and relationship with God is the best thing anyone can do to get into spiritual shape.  No one ever said that being a Christian was easy.  Even Jesus admitted that to us.  I mean, He was ridiculed and persecuted AND He died so we DID NOT have to!!!!!! That is the amazing part.  When you're going through a tough time in your life imagine if He had not put Himself in your position.  Imagine where you would be today.  You probably would have had to die on that cross.  With all the trials and tribulations we go through, it could have been SO much worse.  Instead, we have such a loving Savior that He chose to give Himself up for us.  That's like this day in age, when someone is pointing a gun at us because we committed some sort of crime.  Now, imagine someone jumping in front of you (someone YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW) saying shoot me instead because this man is innocent through me.  Excuse me?! Yeah, like that would happen now.  But if it did!! That is what Jesus did for us.  He jumped in front of that bullet and ASKED to be shot.  He didn't just jump in the line of fire, He stood there and ASKED to be shot.  That is an amazing love.  So, from here on out, I don't care how much it hurts to workout, I'm doing it because God gave me this life in order to worship Him.  What better way than living my life in EVERY aspect including getting myself in shape, to be healthier for HIM..  hmmmmm i cannot wait.

study your Bible

I've realized today that I do not know my Bible the way that I should.  I started writing interpretive notes in it today while my pastor was preaching.  The way that things were being said, made perfect sense to me so I wrote them down.  I need to actually study my Bible.  Imagine that!  I need to study God's Word.  ha who knew?!  One of my New Year's Resolutions was to read the whole Bible all the way through.  So, I believe tonight is the night to start.  I am excited because I cannot wait to see what God is going to be teaching me.  What is your Spiritual New Year's Resolution?  What do you want to do for God this year?  What do you want to change for God?  I'd like to hear your story.  Maybe it'll challenge me too!

holistic attractiveness

Attractiveness is not something that is all physical.  Physical attraction is important but what happens when your physical beauty is gone?  What then?  In order to be attractive to future spouse, be holistically attractive.  Your spirit is the one thing that most people notice about but sometimes cannot pinpoint why they notice something about you.  Those people usually want what you have.  This is holistically attractive.  You take care of yourself inside and out.

For instance, right now, I workout like my life is depending on it.  Guess what?  It is.  I know if I don't change then I could be slowly killing myself..... so I am not trying to become physically attractive to my future spouse but that is just a bonus.  But, I am also trying my hardest to become closer to God because this is what I know God wants and something I have a yearning desire for.  If you have a wonderful relationship with God and your future spouse does too... let me tell you, you will be attractive to that person no matter what you look like.  And your future spouse will be the same to you.  Who said that we are supposed to pinpoint the kind of attractiveness we want in our lives?  Only God knows that.  We may know what we want but God knows what we need.  Honestly, I think being physically attractive is just a bonus compared to what your spirit can be.  I pray that this challenges you to want to be more like Christ and you will have the best love story you could ever dream of.

God of love

God is the god of Love.  I don't care what the Greeks say.  And because of this, I'm learning what kind of man I need to be with.  For instance, who wants to be with a man who is rude and mean and vile with you?  What kind of relationship is this going to be?  A woman also needs someone to protect her.  This one is a biggie for me.  God protects and loves his children more than all other things He created.  I know that these two things out of many that various women have on their list, are exactly what they need.  Then why do so many women choose to be treated like dirt?  I am still trying to figure this one out.  They hope for a man that treats them with all the love they feel they deserve but are trapped in relationships they cannot get out of.

I can tell you right now, God is the god of love and protection.  He is everything I need.  I know He meets my every need in every way.  I could not ask for a better relationship.  I know He will not be rude or mean or vile with me and I know He will always love me. He protects me from things I cannot handle and takes them for Himself.  What man do you know that would do this no matter how much you hurt Him or deny Him or push Him away?  I know I do not mean to do these things, I know I do them.  But, I do know I am completely overwhelmed by His love for me right now!

love never fails

Love Never Fails - Brandon Heath http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nQy-aP_Koo

Lately, I have been wrestling with the fact of what true love really is.  Where can you really find it?  Is it hiding from me?  Am I just not looking hard enough?  I recently had a friend who told me the description of what love is.  He used a movie to describe it to me (one of the best ways, by the way, to describe something to me).  Anyway, I had an overwhelming.... i don't know... hurt of some kind but not really.... ache maybe.  God is always with me.  God NEVER fails.  Though I think He may not be listening or there or whatever, He is waiting for His perfect timing.  It's hard going through life without a hand to hold and people constantly telling you that "maybe you're supposed to end up single".  If I believed that, I wouldn't be hurting when I do.  This past week was rough.  Luckily I had a friends to hang with to get my mind off of things, when looking back on it, I should have run to God. 

Today, in church we learned about sins and confessing to not just God but those whom you have wronged.  This is NOT an easy task in the slightest, but I know that peace will flow when things are done right.  So, I am not confessing a sin to you.  I have wronged myself, you and God in filling up my time this past week with nonsense games, talking, noise..... when I should have been still with God.  Logically, I know God never fails.  Sometimes it's hard to live your life without something grabbing your heart to strangle you.  I put on Christian music not 15 minutes ago and this song came up.  Once again, I was emotional because it's true.  Sometimes I need to be reminded of how faithful God is and how much He really loves me, even if no one else does.  So thank You, God for never giving up on me when I totally deserve it.  You deserve more than me but I know You think otherwise.  I love you for that.

picking friends

Picking good Christian friends is one of the hardest things to do.  As a Christian, surrounding yourself with those of good Christian counsel and who encourage you are key in this world.  Though they may not understand decisions you make or whatnot... a good Christian friend is with you always.  They pray you through your troubles and help pick you up when you fall.  They walk with you through all of your joy and happiness and are your constant cheerleader.  These friends have the foundation of Jesus and even though what you or they may be going through, their faith carries them through as well as praying you through.  Picking friends can define us but let God help you through that.  I am learning who my true friends are.  Though it sucks that I may have had to distance myself with a few people who were not what God calls for us to have, I know that I can be a witness to them.  It is a hard task and sometimes you may feel alone.  We are human and are made for the human connection but we are also spiritual beings and when you have the love and power of Jesus Christ, having a longing for Him is all you need.  Let Jesus help you choose your friends and pray that He directs you to them.  It will definitely benefit you physically but most of all spiritually.

being a servant

Ya know, serving is one of the major parts of relationship that most people tend to forget.  Having a servant for a husband or having a servant for a wife is one of the best possible scenarios that a marriage can become.  Jesus called us to be servants to each other because He came to serve us.  If we want to be like Jesus in our relationships and marriage then we need to serve each other.  Though I may not be in a relationship right now, I can tell you that I am.  Jesus and I are doing great! :) I long to serve Him in everything I do.  I know that I will fail and falter but my faith will never be shaken.  Serving God is one of the best things that I can do in this world.  Wait, THE best thing I can do in this world!!  When others see me I want them to see Jesus.  I am learning to serve those around me the best that I know how and with God's help I will improve.  Jesus also serves me with His best.  It is a great relationship! 

But, for those who are in a relationship or not in one but trying to figure out how to make it work when you are single, SERVE!  That is my answer.  In order to be a Christian that is not just a face value, hold your hand up in the air, HONK-IF-YOU-LOVE-JESUS Christan, you need to act like Jesus, read AND study His word, pray.  These are the basics and necessities for being a servant of God.  When you have these, you will be a GREAT servant to your spouse.  You do not want to be in a relationship where one person is selfish and the other serves all the time, do you?  That is not what Jesus called us to do.  That is just selfish.  He called us to SERVE!!! Trust me, I am learning this like no other.  It is hard to serve those who are ungrateful, but you know what.... Jesus did it all the time without complaining, and did it with more love than you and I could EVER know.  He loves you.  He loves those around you.  So why not be Jesus to those people and serve them.  Then once you get into a relationship, Jesus will be the center and serving will be that much greater of a reward!  I'm ready to serve Jesus to the best of my ability and more... how about you?